Things No One Asked For: Prosecco-Flavored Nail Polish

by Ryan Hudak on Mar 22, 2017 in Culture

If you’re the kind of alcoholic who needs to have booze on your person at all times, Groupon has just the product for you: prosecco-flavored nail polish. Ignoring the fact that Groupon is for some reason getting into producing nail polish, the company announced that the glittery gold polish is edible and contains real prosecco. The company says the “lick-able” polish tastes and smells just like the real thing.

This is great news for the finger-biting alcoholic in your life or, according to Groupon’s announcement, your mom—the nail polish is being released to help celebrate Mother’s Day. I’m not sure what mother needs or wants this, but she surely is the type of hard-working mom we all know and love who also happens to still suck her thumb. The nail polish—cleverly called “Prosecco Polish”—is also a great gift to give someone if you want to subtly hint that you have a creepy finger sucking fetish.  
 
There is no word of an actual ABV, but the nail polish comes with its fair share of warnings. Groupon warns us that the polish should be kept away from “heat/sparks/open flames,” which is probably a solid course of action for your fingers in general, and adds that you shouldn’t drink the polish straight from the bottle—which means you trash people who need that kind of thing to get drunk will have to stick with NyQuil.
 
Unfortunately, this miracle of modern science isn’t for sale and is only available in the UK, so you’re out of luck if you’re an American who needs an easy way to randomly lick someone’s fingers.

Photo via Flickr user L.C.Nøttaasen


Tags: Terrible Ideas
Recent Articles
spacer

Feedback

How are we doing? Tell us what you like or don't like and how we can improve. We would love to hear your thoughts!

*Name:
*E-mail:
*Suggestions:
 
Colorado Wines to Shine this Holiday Season

Colorado Wines to Shine this Holiday Season

All of these wines are 2017 winners in the Colorado Governor's Cup....read more ›

by Carrie Dow Nov 14, 2017
Celebrate National Yeti Day at Great Divide Brewing

Celebrate National Yeti Day at Great Divide Brewing

Friday, November 17, is the second annual National Yeti Day. ...read more ›

by Carrie Dow Nov 14, 2017
Sat
Nov 18
Sat
Nov 18
Sat
Nov 18
SPONSORED
Enjoy a Taste of Fall with These Denver Cocktails

Enjoy a Taste of Fall with These Denver Cocktails

These seasonal sips will light you up as the days get shorter....read more ›

by Carrie Dow Nov 14, 2017
Celebrate the Dark Side at Wynkoop's Day of Darks

Celebrate the Dark Side at Wynkoop's Day of Darks

It's a taste of Denver's darker side. ...read more ›

by Carrie Dow Nov 7, 2017
Molly's Spirits to Host Animal Adoption Event
by Carrie Dow Nov 6, 2017
Napa Valley is Running a Christmas-Themed Wine Train to the 'North Pole' For the Holidays

Napa Valley is Running a Christmas-Themed Wine Train to the 'North Pole' For the Holidays

If you've ever wanted to travel to the North Pole for the holidays, you can - but you have to get to the Napa ...read more ›

by The Drink Nation Nov 6, 2017
Brace Yourself: A Wine Shortage is Imminent

Brace Yourself: A Wine Shortage is Imminent

Europe is bracing for the lowest wine yield in decades, dropping 14% from 2016....read more ›

by Alexander Frane Nov 6, 2017
Delta is Now Serving Complimentary Prosecco on Select Flights

Delta is Now Serving Complimentary Prosecco on Select Flights

Delta Airlines is now serving complimentary prosecco on all of its international flights, including to coach customers....read more ›

by Alexander Frane Nov 6, 2017
A Rare Sam Adams Beer, Utopia, Is Being Released

A Rare Sam Adams Beer, Utopia, Is Being Released

Sam Adams has released their biennial Utopias beer, a barrel aged ale that is illegal in 12 states due to its high alcohol content....read more ›

by Jessie Donofrio Oct 31, 2017
SPONSORED
View all Articles

Sign up to get weekly drinking news, bar reviews, events and more sent directly to your inbox!

Close